The Pillar
by Heffalump Army
Summary: ...'Second year, you guys were getting on alright. But then one day you said something rude to him and ever since, you've hated him and he's been chasing you. As far as I know, you started it.' The real reason Lily hates James Potter. Please r&r.


**This was originally the begining of my other story. For obvious reasons, I changed it. But then I made this a one shot on why Lily hates James... it just seems on a likely enough reason. So, enjoy!**

**None of the characters, except Charlotte, belong to me.**

* * *

"Oh come _on, _what have you got against the poor guy- _other_ than that he fancies you?" 

"Have you _talked _to him?"

"Well, yeah- But I also remember how you two used to be! I mean, first year, neither of you liked each other, but second year, you guys were getting on alright. But then one day you said something rude to him and ever since, you've hated him and he's been chasing you. As far as I know, _you _started it," Charlotte laughed.

"Charlotte, I love you, but being my best friend doesn't mean you get to know everything," she laughed.

"I'm going to bug you about this until we graduate if I have to."

"Hey, just one more year."

"Oh come _on_! Tell me!" She begged.

"Tell her what?" Sirius Black came bounding out of the portrait hole.

"_No_," Lily groaned, ignoring him.

"Do you-" Charlotte began, turning to Sirius.

"_Charlotte!_" Lily shot her a glare. So he _did_ know.

"Do you know why Lily hates James so much?" Charlotte grinned, shooting a smirk at Lily before turning to him.

"As a matter of fact, I do. But I think that's something Lilykins should tell you herself." Now it was Lily's turn to smirk.

"_Oh_, whipe that stupid smirk off your face. He said you _should_. As in, 'you're being a bad friend for _not_ telling me'." Lily scowled, and shrugged.

"I guess that makes me a bad friend then, eh?" She laughed and skipped off towards dinner.

"So you won't tell me?" Charlotte turned to Sirius.

"I don't think I said that."

* * *

"Where's Charlotte?" Alice looked up from her plate as Lily seated herself in the Great Hall. 

"I'm not sure, actually. She was right behind- Oh no."

"What?" Alice turned around to see Charlotte approaching, a huge smile spread across her face.

"What have you got that stupid grin on your face for?"

"Do you really want me to answer that?"

"_Ugh! _He _told_ you?!" Lily shouted.

"What are you two on about?" Alice asked curiously.

"Ooh! Ooh! Can I tell her?"

"_No! You're_ not even supposed to know."

"Well, I do. So if you don't, _I_ will."

"Fine, just not here, alright? After dinner."

"Okay," Charlotte grinned to herself.

* * *

_"Hey Lily?"_

_"Yeah?"_

_"Are-are you..."_

_"Am I what?" she asked curiously. James was playing with his hands nervously._

_"Well what I meant was..." Lily waited for him to continue, but he didn't._

_"You alright, Potter?"_

_" 'C-course I am. I wanted to know if you were um... understanding Charms okay."_

_"Yeah..." Lily stared up at him confused. "Yeah, I'm getting it okay, I guess." It was a strange question, seeing as how everyone knew Lily was top in her class._

_"Alright then." He continued and sprinted for the door. Lily stared after him confused, shrugged, and then went on her merry way. But minutes later, she heard hurried whispering in the halls, and then James was standing awkwardly a few yards behind her._

_"Oy! Evans!" He shouted._

_"Yeah?" She turned to face him._

_"You. Me. Hogsmeade. Friday," he turned and walked away._

_"What?" she stared at him incredulously, but he didn't turn around. "Have you gone mad?" She asked when she caught up to him._

_"What'd I say?"_

_"We're not even allowed to go to Hogsmeade until next year!" She snapped._

_"Well," James sighed. "If you don't want to go, I guess I'll just ask one of the other girls lining up to go out with me." Lily felt her face go red._

_"First of all, I never once gave you the impression that I could even stand you," Lily began hotly. "And secondly? I could care less! You go do that then!" She glared at him._

* * *

"That's all?" 

"No, that's not _all_," Lily shot back.

"_Well_?" Alice pressed.

"What'd he do? Say something mean about you?"

"No," Lily rolled her eyes.

"Steal your last... _cupcake_?" Charlotte joked.

"Oh right. That's _exactly_ what he did."

"Come on!"

"Yeah, come_ on_ Lils!" Sirius mocked behind her.

"Get out!" Lily threw a pillow from the couch at him. "You're not allowed in the Head Dorms unless James is here!"

"It's a free country."

"So anyway," Charlotte began, "I had my period and-"

"_Bye_," Sirius snapped.

"Okay, can you keep going _now_?" Alice turned to Lily as soon as Sirius was closing the door.

* * *

_James looked unexpectedly hurt, and suddenly Lily felt her stomach drop. She hadn't expected him to be disappointed. He'd been so sure of himself. He deserved it... right?_

_"Look-" She paused. "James, I-"_

_"Changed your mind?" He raised an eyebrow. "I knew you'd come around-" Any sign of remorse was gone._

_"Actually, I was going to say I was sorry for being as harsh as I did- But then I realized I'm NOT. Hmph!" She turned her heel and stomped off into the common room._

_"Fine!" He said childishly._

_

* * *

_"So then what happened?" Peter asked eagerly 

"Remind me how we got onto this topic?" James asked. Remus sighed and put down his book.

"Sirius came running up to you about five minutes ago to tell you that Lily was about to ruin your self acclaimed great reputation with girls," he said flatly. After a glare from James, he laughed.

"Thanks Remus."

"Hey, I wasn't the one that looked like it was Christmas come early when I found out about it," he grinned.

"Do werewolves even celebrate Christmas?"

"Thanks Sirius."

"What happened?" Peter whined.

"Well then, James made an ass out of himself further-" Sirius began.

"You told me to!"

"Just get on with it," Remus rolled his eyes.

"Okay, but _I_ get to tell it, since you don't tell it right," Sirius grinned sheepishly.

* * *

_"Thanks a lot!" James snapped as his friends burst out laughing. "I listened to you and look where it got me!"_

_"Hate to say I told you so," Remus smirked._

_"No you don't."_

_"Good point."_

_"Oh god Jamesie, that has to have been the best laugh I've had in a long time. You should've seen her when she burst in here not five minutes ago."_

_"Great," James groaned. "So she's up there in her room telling everyone else what a git I am."_

_"She could be," Sirius muttered darkly._

_"Sirius!"Remus laughed. "Actually, she just came in to get her books. She headed back down towards what I'd assume was the library."_

_"He's lying to make you feel better," Sirius mumbled._

* * *

"He's lying," Lily said. "He's just trying to make James look a little better." 

"Sirius is too stupid for that," Charlotte laughed.

"N- Well he forgot then."

"Look, I'm just telling you what he told me!"

"I don't see what the big deal is," Alice said. Charlotte snorted.

"The big deal? The big deal? James didn't feel anything for me EVER. He's just a jerk."

"You've been saying that, but we have proof of otherwise... and not all that much to back _you_ up. Sorry Lils," Alice shrugged.

"Just get on with it."

* * *

_"Evans!" Lily whirrled around to find Sirius desperately trying to catch up to her._

_"What?" Lily asked cooly._

_"You okay? You don't look so good. Like maybe you just passed up the chance of a lifetime-"_

_"Look, tell James to keep you out of this, okay? And I don't want Remus approaching me either- though I doubt _he_'s stupid enough to get involved."_

_"You don't have the hots for Remus, do you? Aw crap, if James finds out, all hell-"_

_"No, I _don't_, I just don't feel like getting into this with you. If James wants to talk to me, he can come over here himself, and until he applogizes, I don't want to hear anything from him either!"_

_"I don't see what the big deal is," Sirius shrugged._

_"That's because you're as bad as he is!"_

_"SH!" The librarian snapped. Lily shot a glare at Sirius and moved to the next isle of books. He continued to pester her, but she'd finally found the book she was looking for, and was now finding an empty desk and flipping through it._

_"Look, I can understand being scared of James, seeing you've never had a proper boyfriend before-" Lily's head snapped up and the look on her face made him instantly wish he'd never said anything- never been able to talk in his entire life._

_"I am not afraid of James Potter," she said flatly. Sirius let out a breath until she continued, "And if you don't get out of here, I will hex you into the next century." Sirius got up as calmly as he could muster and then bolted for the door, hoping James wouldn't find out he'd talked to Lily... and, incidentally, made things a hell of a lot worse._

_Straight through dinner, Lily read. She didn't get up, despite the harassment she recieved from Charlotte when she'd found her, nor would she get up for Alice's much more polite and quiet pleas. She didn't have much of an appetite. She didn't want anybody else to get up and approach her either. So she decided she would just head to the dorms early._

_In truth, Lily didn't know why it got to her so much. It was only James Potter. None of the stupid things he'd said before had really irritated her. But he'd been so arrogant about it. Something about his sureness upset her- because she'd always thought he was better than that. She'd expected him to be nicer than that. She thought she knew James, but apparently not. It was a bit frustrating, and frankly? It was also extremely disheartening. Lily wasn't about to admit she harboured feelings for him, because really, she didn't- she couldn't. Okay, maybe a little. But nothing more. Honest. But he'd blown it. After they'd finally formed what might've been considered a friendship, he'd blown it by being an asshole._

_"Lils?" His voice interrupted her thoughts. Startled, she dropped her books. _Crap_. "S-sorry. Sorry, didn't mean to... let me help." He stumbled about, trying to help, but actually making the mess worse._

_"Are you alright?" He was shaking slightly, making his attempts to pick up what she'd dropped that much harder. "Here, I've got it." She scooped her books from the floor with one swift movement of her wand._

_"Oh... right... magic," he laughed nervously. "Me? Yeah, yeah I'm... I'm fine. Never been bet- Okay, Lils- Lily? I'm sorry. About... today. I was a prat."_

_"Alright." She was accepting his appology, but she was still somewhat bothered._

* * *

"Story's over!" James and the other Marauders burst into the head dorms as Lily exclaimed the exact same thing 

"Wonder whar story Lily was telling," Sirius said innocently.

"I wonder, do dogs have as many lives as cats?" Charlotte glared at Sirius. "Let's find out, shall we?" He was now signaling frantically, though trying to be secret about it. And failing.

"What's wrong with _him_?" Lily looked up at Charlotte.

"She knows?" James mumbled.

"Knows what?" Peter looked around cluelessly.

"She _knows_," Remus laughed. "Does she know why?" he asked abrubtly.

"He didn't tell me," Charlotte shrugged. "But then I didn't want to know that much or I could've persuaded him to tell me," she smirked at him.

"I love how proud you are of being a manipulative-"

"Can you guys get out? We were in the middle of a story," she murmured rather than get angry at them like she usually did.

"So were we," James said flatly.

"Well nobody bloody cares, seeing as we were here first and ours is a bit more personal than yours," Lily stood up to face him.

"I seriously doubt that."

"We were here first," she shrugged.

"You've been hoarding the room all day!"

"Why don't you just go into _your_ room? Nobody's in there."

"Why don't... why don't _you_?"

"How original."

"Just cause you've got a perky top half doesn't mean-" Charlotte slapped Sirius before Lily even had a chance to react.

"Stop looking at her then," she shrugged.

"I'm going up to my room," James said finally.

"HA!" Lily mouthed to Charlotte.

"I'm just fine here," Sirius tried, but after recieving a few glares, he retreated up to James' room- though not before reassuring Charlotte to the last that he'd "come back for her".

"_I don't see why you hate him,_" Lily mocked.

"Shut up and let me get on with the story!"

* * *

_"It's just... I'm nervous. Sirius said not to say that, but I mean... look how far his advice's gotten me..." James let out a small laugh._

_"Nervous?"_

_"Lily, I like you," he sighed. "I really, really like you."_

_"Oh...well I...I..." Lily didn't know what to say. Her cheeks were extremely flushed._

_"I can understand if you don't... erm... like me, you know, back... Or if you, you know, hate me. After... today. I just, I had to tell you, Lily."_

_"I don't hate you," she whispered quietly. "I um..." She looked up at James, her eyes wide. "I think you're okay, James."_

_"You don't hate me?"_

_"Nah," she grinned. _James isn't so bad.

_He smiled back. "Cool. I was worried I'd kind of screwed things up between us. Sirius is a bit of a git with girls, and I should've ignored him... he told me to try some pretty stupid things, now that I think of it..."_

_Lily snorted. "I can imagine."_

_"Some of it was kind of decent though. He was all telling me to find out what kind of guys you went for, and then act like them."_

_"He did, huh? Well, then, I don't think you should listen to Sirius either, if that was one of his better ideas."_

_"Are you going to tell me what guy I should act like?" Lily surpressed one very uncharacteristic, girlish giggle._

_"No, I'm not."'_

_"Aw, c'mon!"_

_"Don't laugh?"_

_"Promise."_

_"Okay, I've always liked the way Quidditch players look, like right after the game. I know it's kind of gross, cause they're all sweaty, you know? But... Charlotte calls it 'Quidditch hair'," she laughed. "But basically the rugged look, for lack of a better way to put it."_

_"I believe Sirius refers to it as 'sex hair'." Lily burst out laughing._

_"Very charming, he is. Not in the bit tactless."_

_"Yeah, well, that's Sirius." They exchanged grins and Lily felt her stomach drop happily. She was surpressing the urge to kiss James, who was about to say something. What it was, however, nobody could really be sure, because at that very moment, Sirius Black stuck his big, stupid, _fat_ head around the corner, gave James a thumbs up, and winked. James shut his mouth for a second and took a deep breath. _I am so stupid.

_"Well, it's a good thing you're not supressing your feelings," he grinned, fighting a groan back down his throat._

_"Pardon?"_

_"Well, now that you've admitted you're in love with me, I think I might just-"_

_"Are you bipolar?" she snapped. "I'm so serious! You need to go to the bloody hospital wing, you know that? First, you're nice, then you act like an ass, you appologize, and now you're going to be an ass again? What is your problem today?"_

_"Hey, there's no trying to pretend you can resist me," James laughed. "You've been caught, Lily. And now, I'm undressing you with my eyes." Lily glared at him._

_"James Potter, do you think I'm an idiot? All you do is tell girls what they want to hear and then you go right back to being an arrogant prat! Just because _you_ think you're good looking doesn't mean the rest of us are blind-" She was cut off, however. James Potter had backed her into the wall, swung his arm around her waist, and pulled her into a very deep kiss before she could even blink. She felt a soft nibble on her bottom lip, and when she instinctively moved it, she felt his tongue slide into her mouth. She was about to kiss him back, when he broke from the kiss, smirking._

_"I don't think I was the only one-"_

_"Mr. Potter! Mis Evans-" Without a second thought, Lily slapped James across the face._

_"Don't TOUCH me!" She snapped, and raced out of sight, stopping at the corner to hear what would happen._

_"Mr. Potter, would you mind explaining why you and Miss Evans were... in such a compromising position?" Professor McGonagall was asking, cooly._

_"I kissed her."_

_"Did she tell you it was okay to kiss her, Potter?"_

_"No, m'am."_

_"Did she tell you _not_ to kiss her Mr. Potter?"_

_"Well... not exactly."_

_"Potter," she sighed. "If Miss Evans complains to me, you're in a lot of trouble young man." And with that, she turned on her heel, muttering to herself about the stupidity of _some children!

_"Way to go, Jamesie!" Sirius came bouding out from another corner. "So, I see you've got your kiss."_

_"She hates me," James whispered._

_"Yeah," Sirius nodded enthusuastically, "And you got your kiss!"_

_"I have to go find Lily," he mumbled. He didn't have to look far. As soon as he turned the corner, he saw flaming red hair sticking out from behind a nearby pillar. She was slumped up against it, trying to clear her mind. "I'm so-"_

_"I don't want to hear it!" She snapped._

_"I don't see what the big deal is," Sirius shot back._

_"You wouldn't!"_

_"It was just a kiss. It wasn't like it was your _first_ kiss-" Sirius stopped as his eyes met hers. "It was, wasn't it Evans?"_

_"I'm twelve years old! Of course it was!" She spat. "You don't get those back, and now I get to be traumatised by your git of a friend every time my kids ask me about my first kiss!"_

_"Kids? You have kids but you expect me to believe you've never-"_

_"I'm talking about in the future!" She snapped. "You've ruined it, both of you. You had to tell him to do something stupid, and YOU!" She pointed at James. "You just had to listen!"_

_"Lily?" Andrew Davies called out from nearby. Lily crept around the pillar._

_"Yeah?" she fought back a blush._

_"Everyone in the Great Hall's saying you... you kissed James Potter."_

_"What?"_

_"Yeah. Lily, I thought you were supposed to be _my_ girlfriend! I can't go out with you if you're kissing other boys." Lily sighed. Davies had asked her out that morning and she'd already forgotten about it._

_"Yeah? Well, I wasn't! You should be able to trust me, you know that?"_

_"I guess," he shrugged. "Yeah... you're right. So, what're you doing back there, anyway?" Out of the corner of her eye, Lily saw Sirius sneaking out from behind the pillar. Andrew walked around the pillar, to find James sitting guiltily in the corner._

_"What's HE doing here?" He snapped._

_"I don't know!"_

_"It's true, isn't it?"_

_"No-"_

_"You're dumping me for Potter?"_

_"Andrew, no, I don't even _like_ Potter! James, tell him."_

_"You're calling him James now?"_

_"Sorry Mate," James sighed, "Didn't mean for you to find out like this-"_

_"He's lying!" Lily shouted._

_"Lily, I thought you loved me."_

_"We're twelve!" She shouted after him, but he was already stalking off, a hurt look on his face. "You are such an ass!" She yelled, rounding on James. It was the first time Lily Evans had ever sworn. She was having _a lot_ of firsts today, it seemed._

_"You hussie, you," Sirius teased from behind her. She grabbed her book bag and hit Sirius with it as hard as he could._

_"Lily?" Severus was heading down the hallway. "Are you alright? I heard Davies yelling about you back there-" He stopped dead in his tracks. "Did you really? Did you kiss him?" She looked on the brink of tears. "What'd you do to her?" Snape demanded. When nobody told him, he put his arm around Lily, patting her on the shoulder. "Let's go," he whispered._

_"Lily, I-"_

_"Get away from her!" Snape shouted. "Come on, let's get you to Charlotte..."_

* * *

"Wow," Remus grumbled. James was still inwardly wincing, clearly trying (and failing) to shake the memory from his head. 

"I do not have a fat head," Sirius mumbled.

"..."

"I just listen for my name," he informed them.

* * *

"I might not like him either," Alice said thoughtfully. 

"Seeing that it's so long ago, I think it's funny _now_. Then, I probably would've killed James if you'd have told me what he'd done."

"No, you wouldn't have. That was when you were still good friends with him."

"If you'd have told me, that would've been an end to it. So, I suppose I'm glad I just found out, but wow. He used to be a real prat, didn't he?"

"Used to be? Are you kidding?"

"Well he hasn't done it recently, has he?"

"Last year-"

"Then he's not a prat."

"He stole my first kiss! To this day he thinks it's funny."

"It was a long time ago, Lily."

"Yeah, well... Nothing's changed."

"Really?"

"Absolutely nothing."

"And you mean that?"

"Yes I do," Lily said hotly.

"Funny you should say that..."

"Why?"

"Because, according to that story, you had a bit of a crush on Jamesie back then..."

"I've wasted enough time not doing my homework," Lily said flatly, waving Charlotte's comment aside. "I told you what you want to know. Congratulations, you have reason to harass me... forever."

"Yeah, pretty much," Charlotte replied. Lily got up and left the room rather hastily. She hadn't even grabbed her books. It'd been years since it happened and yet, even looking back at it as if it'd all been some hillarious joke, she couldn't help but feel miserable. She sighed as she wandered over to the exact same pillar.

* * *

He sat their, stiffly, his back toward her. "Was it three or four years ago?" James asked her. He had, apparently, beaten her to the pillar this year. 

"Three."

"Are you ever going to let me live that down?"

"No," she whispered, a faint smile on her face.

"Never gets old, does it? Not that it's funny..." She shook her head. "I bet Charlotte's giving you a hard time for holding a grudge that long, eh?"

"Yeah, sort've. Not yet. She will though."

"Right." James nodded and Lily sat next to him.

"Why do I keep coming back here?" She asked finally.

"Because you can't resist me?" He stood up. She stood up to face him.

"Oh right. I-" He had her pushed against the wall. He was kissing her and she was kissing him back. She didn't usually. Usually, she slapped him and glared at him. Or he didn't give her the chance. He would give her the best kiss she'd ever had and then he'd move back with a grin on his face like he knew.

"Ahem." James whipped around to find Charlotte smirking, arms crossed. Sirius had just stood next to her, his face mirroring hers perfectly. "I suppose you're renewing your grudge, are you?"

"They do this every year-" Sirius began, but was cut off by a slight gasp.

"Lily?" He sounded hurt.

"Hey... Andrew."

* * *

**This was really bad. I'll admit it. I wrote it a really long time ago and found it today. Like I said, it was originally the begining to A Bit Too Much Butterbeer for reasons I can't even begin to fathom. I started it before I wrote "Nightgowns" (which is, if you haven't read it, a real piece of work... and not in an especially flattering way) but, if I remember correctly, I had no intention of submitting this after about the first half or so and just finished it just to kind of finish it. So it hasn't been edited much. Regardless, this was the end result. I figure there's no _harm _in putting it on here, seeing as I've already kind of killed any concept of me being able to write well. I think the only decent thing I've had up here was the opening chapter to A Bit Too Much Butterbeer... and parts of the deleted chapters. Haha. Oh well. I liked the for this one idea, but I screwed up the ending... sort've. Couldn't leave 'well enough' alone. So I hope at least one person liked this.**

**Review please! I could really use some constructive criticism.**

**Thanks:)**


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